So my brother turns 16 on the 16th and he's been smoking for about 2months and cant go a secont with out having one. He smokes about 1-2packs a day if he has them or a friend gives them to him. I keep telling him the facts but he wont listen to me or his girl friend who hats that he smokes, drinks and ***** around. If he's not high he's having unprotected sex or talking sudusavley to other girls NOT HIS GIRLFRIEND.
When he gets high all he thinks about is SEX or MAKES Sex jokes OR Gesters.
It's driving me crazy
HELP
Suggestion:
He's 15. He's busy trying to become his own person, and there's very little other people can do about it unless he wants to be like them or wants them to like him. He might be taking that a little far, but honestly, unless he WANTS to stop any of the above, there's no chance he will.
How do you make him want to stop smoking? You could go on and on about all the horrible things that smoking does to you, but if he doesn't want to listen, he's not going to listen. Your best bet is letting him know you love him and are really concerned about him. Don't tell him what to do. Tell him how it affects you and how it makes you feel. If he feels like he's in control of his own decisions and he's not just doing something somebody else *told* him to do, he's more likely to do it. It's sort of like getting a teenager to do the dishes… if you say "Do the dishes!" it won't happen, but if you ask them "Do you want to do the dishes and I'll take the vacuuming, or do you want the vacuuming?" they'll choose to do one or the other. The key is getting them to make the choice to do it themselves. Forcing anything will only make them resolve not to do it. Being a teenager is all about fighting to be your own person and make your own decisions, and fighting against anyone who tries to tell you how you should live your life and what you should do.
The best way for him to stop this lifestyle is for him to make mistakes and learn from them. You can only hope something will happen to make him learn sooner rather than later, and that the consequences aren't too horrible. Try asking questions (in a non-confrontational way) that will make him think, like, "If you got a girl pregnant, would you marry her?" or "If mom smoked and died of cancer when we were young, what do you think would've happened to us?"
If he feels like what he is doing is the wrong thing to do, he won't do it anymore. He has to think it for himself though, and you can't force it on him.
{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }
Kill yourself and leave a letter for him saying that you killed yourself because of his bad habits that should work if not it must suck being you
Unless he wants to quit himself, he never will. Your nagging will only make him want to carry on.
let him find out what happens by himself
Show him Call Of Duty.
Talk to your parents. If they don't do anything about it, tell him if he smokes one more, he's going to die.
My uncle died from lung cancer about 7 weeks ago. He was in the hospital for about a month and he was only in his mid 30's. No joke. My mom smokes and she's the youngest within her now two brothers. He was also a twin. My Uncles twin lives with us at the moment. They were both the very same way, and one of them had to show the other the consequences. We never asked for this to happen. We all loved him so much. He was never around as much as he used to. He was always out getting Pills, Alcohol, Cigarettes etc. He had a horrible wife. Our side of the family is disgusted by her actions. She's the one that sold him this junk. He held a lot of money and they are/were married. So, once he died, the money was hers. She didn't split it with the rest of the family. She kept all of his belongings and sold them for more pills. All we have left are the things she put in her yard sale. Fishing poles, old t-shirts that weren't any good, his cellphone, and not so much more. She's an evil witch and if your brother keeps up his habbits, this is what's going to happen. I'm not trying to scare anyone, these are just the facts. I don't want ANYONE to go through what we had to go through. It's horrible, and heart stopping. Especially for his father, my grandpa. He's about 58, almost 60 and he just cried, and cried and cried. His mother, my grandma felt as if something has been taken from her heart, that will never be given back. All she has are the memories. The love. And the joy of having 3 beautiful children.
Good Luck, and I hope this changes his mind.