Info on the Army/marines Please and Thanks?

I'm 18 years old, and have my GED.
I understand the economy is currently in deep crud.
I also understand joining the Military is a good option in this time.
I'm pretty sure there are more career opportunities in the army, but to make sure, what one has more?
If the Marines were in battle with an enemy, would the group of marines have a better chance of surviving rather than a group of army soldiers?
How are living conditions for Army soldiers compared to Marines?
I still need to take the asvab, but if i score poorly on the mechanical and electronic parts and do good on the math parts, what job categories am i looking at?
If i wanted to become a dentist for the Army, and had no prior knowledge to dental work, would they train me to become one?
If you fail in basic training, is that basically a dishonorable discharge? Im not worried about basic training, i think it will be fun.. im just saying hypothetically.
Do they pay for my family to come visit me? < details would be nice thank you.
Do people smoke weed on their free time? or like before they go to sleep etc?
i know drinking is big in the service, but would i get in trouble being under the age of 21 and drinking on spare time? i heard it is ok aslong as i dont get completely smashed. info from experience would be nice.

any additional information/tips/advice would be highly appreciated because i know i have alot more questions in the back of my mind, i just wont remember till a later on….

Suggestion:

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AgMBdEUcL2yIgEfAQ3P01qjty6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20100716082618AA1muZg&show=7#profile-info-g4H8G30Vaa

Try that link first;

then;

The service will not pay for your family to see you.

If you fail basic you will get a a Honorable, General Discharge or a Chapter for failure to adapt.

Unless you are a DDS you will not go to school in the service to become one.

No one smokes anything anymore since the mid -80's. No smoking. No weed/drugs. No dipping.

You will not be able to purchase alcohol until you turn 21 unless you go to another country like Germany.

If you get a tattoo on a weekend pass during your last few weeks of basic you will be charged with the destruction of government property and failure to obey a lawful order because they will warn you of everything so you don't get stupid while on pass.

The Marines and Army train about the same. Fighting and surviving are two different things. Both will have about the same skillsets but some luck would help a great deal.

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