so i've been with the same guy for almost a year and a half. we had an argument over the fact that will he was at this huge event he went out and smoked with 2 girls. i don't neccesarily have a problem with him smoking, it's just the fact that it was with girls. which he knew i didnt like.
i freaked out at him after he told me and said sorry but he knew i was going to. the problem is i didnt stop bitching and kept going on.
then a few hours later i said i was over it and if we are going to still hangout that night and he didnt want to therefore, i freaked out and didnt shut up once again. i regret every second of it and obviously didnt calm down enough. he broke up with me that night.
some how i persuaded him to give it a week. i wont contact him and he can contact me if he wants to.. if he doesnt by the end of the week then he knows its over.
so am i single? no
and i know this is dumb but on facebook we're still in a relationship, he just removed it from his wall so its under info.
Suggestion:
Doesn't look good. I would wait until you only have a few days left in the whole give it a week and talk to him. Say you know you said you wouldn't contact him, but he is too important to let go without putting up a fight to save what you have. Tell him you were out of line, and you weren't sure why you reacted the way you did. Don't use it as a tool to start an argument back up. If you wan't him back, you might have to let this argument go (win the battle or the war?). Try to remind him of the good times, and convince him that there could be plenty more of those again in the future. Also let him know that you are going to change the way you approach the situation if something like this ever happens again. Say something like if things start escalating that either of you can call a 'time out,' and both of you have to agree not to talk about the subject for a certain period of time (like at least an hour), and you go cool off somewhere and think about things. Chances are that will help stop those spiral escalations where it seems like it is arguing to argue rather than to achieve some goal. If he feels like:
1. He is important to you
2. He remembers how good you two can be, and believes that can continue
3. That you feel remorse for how you acted (and you want to put that behind you ie not bring it up again).
4. That if an argument situation comes up in the future, things may be different (not saying you agree to never fight, or to always agree with him, but just that there are some ground rules about how you do your fighting).
Then he may change his mind.
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